After almost a year of big hopes, expectations of becoming homeless nomads, beginning another great adventure, we succumbed to the reality that we needed help. And not just any help. Help of a Heavenly Magnitude….. After researching in the Bible of Home Selling we knew that there was but one person to call on…. That's right, we called in Saint Joseph. And why not????? He was a carpenter. He was familiar with home selling, home buying, homelessness. If He couldn't make the divine connection between us and the buyer, some frustrated soul who was wandering aimlessly through the real estate ads hopelessly searching out our house, who could????
Well, Saint Joseph arrived Saturday afternoon via FedEx. I expect that that was to keep travel costs down. With trepidation and baited breath, we unsealed him from his traveling unit. He came not only with instructions but also an approved prayer to say over him.
The sun finally came out Sunday afternoon. After making sure that St. Joseph was properly clothed for his next stop, we reverently created his new accommodations. And after gently placing him, upside down, and facing the house, we recited the enclosed prayer together. I also reminded him that i too am a worker of wood, and that before we leave, i would retrieve him and give him a place of honor in my next workshop.
Now some of you out there may be snickering (yes, you in the back. I heard ya) but many folks take this seriously. Some of the testimonials were truly astonishing. M.L of Shebongin sold his house just hours after ordering a St Joseph kit on line. K.M of Seacaucus NJ, after having her house on the market for 25 years sold to a local pig farmer one week after planting Saint Joseph. And the list goes on and on. Just google it and see.
BUT there can be disastrous results if the explicit instructions are not followed. J.D of Flat Rock TX faced Saint Joseph towards his neighbors house. Even though it was not for sale, a buyer came the next day and offered twice what the house was worth. After the sale, the new owner opened a clandestine brothel.
C.M. of Short Horn Fl followed the instructions and sold his house a month later. BUT failing to retrieve Saint Joseph, the house continued to resell for the next five years until landscaper Jose Gonzalez found Saint Joseph and rescued him. Jose placed St Joe on the dashboard of his 1948 Chevy pickup, which was on its last legs, and the truck sold that afternoon for over $200,000.00. Apparently, it was one of the few trucks that was made by a dyslexic worker who sometimes reversed the brake and gas pedal.
J.K of Landown MS received an offer to buy his house shortly after buying a Saint Joseph Sell Your HouseKit. BUT he failed to follow the instructions and the morning of the closing the deal fell through. That night a giant sink hole opened in his backyard and swallowed the house. It was then that he remembered he had cancelled his homeowners insurance.
The stories are endless.
AND now the waiting has begun. Beatrice and I are taking turns watching from the front porch or manning the phone. And all the while we are shouting our new battle cry……
The Buyers are coming!!!!! The Buyers are coming!!!!!!